by Crystal Dupay

There are many benefits to joining a playgroup. Your children have the opportunity to form friendships and play with someone other than a sibling. It also gives us mothers a chance to get out of the house and actually speak to an adult other than the mail carrier. Adult conversation is so important to maintaining sanity when you are home with small children 24 hours a day. Within a playgroup you can find other mothers with whom to talk about things that others just don’t understand. Sleeping problems, potty training, and sibling rivalry are just a few of the topics that I have discussed with my stay at home moms friends and have gained valuable insight. When I begin to feel like I’m failing as a mom, they are always there to provide support and reassurance. So how can you find these angels of mercy?

Joining a Playgroup

Look for an already established club. Check bulletin boards in your pediatricians office for information about local playgroups, hang out at the park and ask around about a group, check with local churches to see if they have a program for Mom’s and kids. Check with the manager of local children’s clothing stores or enroll your child in a group such as Gymboree® or Kindermusik ® and meet other motherÂ’s there.

Start Your Own Playgroup

If there is not a group in progress in your area, check with your stay at home moms friends to see if they are interested in getting together on a regular basis. If you don’t know any other stay at home moms strike up a conversation with mom’s that you see at the mall, park, or Drs. office. Chances are, if they are there during office hours, they aren’t working during the day and would probably love the opportunity to meet other stay at home moms.

Once you have found interested moms and kids then you must decide as a group how to organize your club. Some groups are very informal and some are quite structured. The larger the group, the more organization is needed to make things run smoothly. Here are some ideas for small groups

The Details

Decide on a location for the group to meet. Informal groups usually meet in the homes of the members. Of course you would limit the number of children in each playgroup to no more than 4-6 in a home setting. More than that can bring more chaos than fun and the last thing a SAHM needs is more housework after her house has been turned upside down by a large group of children.

Decide on a day and time to meet. Meeting on a regular schedule will allow everyone to plan around the playgroup and therefore you will have greater participation.

Before you begin holding playgroups, you will want the mothers to meet and discuss parenting philosophies. Fewer problems will arise if everyone knows what is expected of their children in terms of behavior.

Discuss what refreshments the host mom will be expected to provide and what the other mothers should bring for the children.

Larger groups of mothers, more than 10, can plan a wider variety of activities. Some groups have officers, committees, and dues in order to provide these activities to the club. Below are some suggestions for groups of more than 10 mom’s:

Meet with the mothers to decide on officers. If your club will charge dues, a treasurer will need to be selected and the group should vote on how the money is to be spent. The amount charged for dues will be directly related to how many activities are planned. One of the officers should be chosen to plan activities.

In a large group, the members will need to be divided into smaller playgroups if plans are to hold them in individual homes. The suggestions given above for smaller playgroups should be followed for these smaller subgroups. If the entire group intends to meet for play, a large gym or hall will need to be secured in order to accommodate everyone. Dues should be used to cover such expenses.

Field Trips and Activities

Visiting a children’s museum, taking a tour of a farm or factory, or visiting a children’s playplace such as Discovery Zone® are just some of the things the entire group can do together. Having the typical holiday parties, providing crafts for the kids to do, and playing such children’s games as “Duck, Duck, Goose” and “Musical Chairs” are things that can be done when the group meets in a gym or other large area.

Some groups enjoy getting the mothers together without the children occasionally just to give them a break and enjoy some uninterrupted adult conversation. Meeting at a restaurant or seeing a movie together are a couple of ideas. Some groups plan weekend retreats for moms only.

Community service projects are something that a large group can carry out quite nicely. Including the children in these acts of service are a great way to show them how good it feels to help others. The possibilities in this area are endless but a couple of examples would be providing a battered women’s shelter with the clothing your children have outgrown, volunteering to serve at a soup kitchen, or visiting with the elderly.

Joining a playgroup can help you and your children get the most out of these “at-home” years. It has definitely made a difference in mine.

About the Author: Crystal Dupay, the mother of an almost 3 year-old and a 1 year-old, has been home for just over a year and loves the opportunity to watch her girls grow everyday. She is active in the Moms & Tots group and also, through her home office, offers administrative support to her husband who has his own business. Visit Crystal’s website, Main Street Mom at http://www.mainstreetmom.com/

 Both at-home and working parents are discovering that playgroups provide the same crucial support that business associations and professional organizations provide in the workforce. If you want to make new friends, meet your neighbors and spend time with your children, you need to consider joining a playgroup. Playgroups are ideal for families on a one-income budget, and even working parents find the benefits worthwhile. Take a look at some of the benefits of a playgroup for both adults and children.

Free or Low Cost Entertainment
For entertainment on a regular basis, the playgroup is unmatched! Weekly playgroups provide an enjoyable diversion where the children can play with friends while their moms talk or where all the members enjoy a structured mom-child activity. Furthermore, playdates are not scheduled just for weekdays; weekend playdates allow working parents and their children to participate in playgroup activities as well.

“We meet three times a week, which is a big help to keep the kids busy during the week and to allow them to make strong friendships,” says Jessica LaLonde, mother of three and founder of Young Moms of Orange County in California.

Plus, whether meeting in each other’s homes or at a central location like a park, spending time with friends in a playgroup doesn’t have to cost a cent! Most neighborhood playgroups do not charge membership dues at all. Although local chapters of national organizations often charge fees, they are nominal and they cover a variety of services and benefits.

Time Out and Support
All parents need a break now and then, but many don’t have the extra money to spend on a Moms Day Out program or on going out. Playgroups offer an opportunity for parents to get that weekly break from home, and yet spend time with their children at the same time.

“There isn’t any ‘off time’ as a parent,” says Danielle Lee of Mission Viejo, California, who founded the Working Moms Community Organization. “Having a support system like a playgroup is somewhat therapeutic.”

Playgroups offer parents a chance to seek parenting advice and share experiences from peers who are facing the same struggles. In today’s society many new mothers not only have postponed having children, but also have moved great distances from their families and friends. They no longer have that built-in support system that all new moms need. Playgroups and parents’ groups fill that gap.

However, playgroups are not just for new mothers. Playgroups for working parents and at-home dads are increasing. They too are finding the support they need as parents.

Practical Support System
Playgroups offer a practical support system through extra services they provide to their members. Some playgroups institute an “In a Pinch” service with a list of moms who can babysit at the last minute. Others set up babysitting co-ops. In both cases, not only is it convenient for parents to have someone they can call at the last minute to babysit, but it is also comforting to have someone whom they know and trust to watch their child. In addition, through playgroup, their children know and feel comfortable with that other adult as well.

“Moms and dads all over have discovered how best friends make the best baby-sitters,” says Gary Myers, author of The Smart Mom’s Baby-sitting Co-op Handbook.

Besides bartering babysitting, many playgroups offer other barter systems, where members exchange goods and/or services with other members. These can include coupons, maternity and children’s clothes, and other baby items as well as services such as mowing the lawn, painting a room, or sewing clothes.

Also, many local businesses offer discounts for non-profit groups, allowing playgroup members to save money at the stores they frequent. That can be a real cost-saving benefit for families on a budget.

Activities and Socialization
Many parents’ groups and playgroups schedule field trips and other special events. The field trips can be “behind the scenes” tours of such places as fire stations, police stations, and other no-cost locations. Members get a chance to see the local sites and learn more about the area in which they live. Some groups even become involved in the community through various service projects.

However, even if a playgroup does not schedule special activities like field trips, playdates provide a chance for socialization. During play, the children learn valuable skills, such as how to share, take turns and role-play. They can also engage in crafts or other structured activities. For families who don’t want to consider preschool or a Moms Day Out program, a playgroup is a viable solution.

Unlike a Moms Day Out program or babysitting service, playgroups keep parents and their children together. That means no worries with separation anxiety! The children can play and have fun without having to worry about mom leaving. It’s a very reassuring and confidence-building way to introduce children to socialization and to give them a little bit of independence at the same time. Not to mention, if the playgroup offers structured activities, it’s 100 percent quality time with your child!

Friendship
Friendship may be the most important reason for joining a playgroup. Playgroups provide children with the opportunity to make new friends and to play with others besides their own siblings. In addition, many of the children in playgroup will likely be in their classes when school starts, especially if the group is composed of neighborhood residents. Children can make lifelong friends in playgroup!

Playgroups are not just for children, however. Playgroups give parents a chance to make new friends and network too. Many adults, too, find lifelong friends in their playgroups!

As a parent, you owe it to yourself and your child to consider joining your local playgroup. So go out and find a playgroup! Your new friends are waiting for you!

 About the Author:
Carren W. Joye is the author of A Stay-at-Home Mom’s Complete Guide to Playgroups. A homeschooling mom of four children, she has founded four successful playgroups and one homeschool support group as well as helped start countless other playgroups around the world via the Internet. Visit her web site at http://www.carrenjoye.com.